Hello, everyone! I haven’t been blogging much lately. I’ve gotten some feedback from beta readers, and I’ve been busy making corrections and redrafting. However, I did want to take a little time to wish everyone a Happy May the Fourth, or Star Wars Day as it has been christened by the fans. I’ve had some strong opinions about Star Wars and holidays on this blog, but I encourage you to take some time to enjoy the legacy of the Original Trilogy, which nobody can take anything from.

(The image of Luke Skywalker staring off into the distance on Tatooine appears. The sound of lightsabers clashing fills the room. You get a glimpse of a young Carrie Fisher in that metal bikini.)

Wait, something is wrong. No, no, it can’t be. I waited too long to post this. We are not approaching the Revenge of the Fifth!

(The image of Luke is replaced with a never-ending run of the Star Wars Holiday special. Carrie Fisher is vanishes and now Jar Jar Binks appears before you in the same metal bikini. Light sabers are replaced with the sound of a committee meeting of blue people bureaucrats arguing with green Asian stereotypes.)

Run, run, run!

(You try your best to escape, but it is futile. A host of reanimated emperors, who just come back from the dead for some reason, follow you down the hall. Stormtroopers and droids fire at you from left and right…though none of them can hit you. You are pelted from all sides by Ewoks with sticks and stones. Finally, you find yourself trapped, surrounded by the Knights of Ren, whom you’ve never seen before and don’t know who they are.)

Damn! There’s no way out!

(Suddenly, a voice comes from the sky! “Use the Force! Feel! Don’t think! Open your Wallet!”)

Huh? That last part sounds suspicious.

(It’s now you realize the voice sounds a lot like Disney CEO Josh D’Amaro. “Feel…into your pocket. Pull out some cash. Hand it over!” You look around. The Knight of Ren, the Ewoks, the Droids and Stormtroopers and dead emperors and everyone is looking at you with a single expectation: buy!)

Dang! Well, I guess they’ve got me. Happy May the Fourth everyone. See you at Galaxy’s Edge.